The Voice, Brought To You By Chase

Have you heard the news? No, I don't mean that Christina's bringing back the cleavage rhombus. Original songs are back! Errr, well, they will be, once we get to the finals. They're sponsored by Chase, and we're going to have to sit through a ridiculous amount of Ellie Kemper commercials from now until then, but that seems like a small price to pay for music that's going to sound as bad as Adam's substitute teacher suit looks. As Carson deadpans, we're "big fans of original music around here." He's 100% right, and 100% underselling my excitement over Alisan's potential single, "John Hughes (Ode To My Youth)." Now we just need to speed up time and get rid of eight of these artists.

Here's Monday's Power Rankling:

1. Emily Keener

   Pro: She's mature and subtle beyond her years, with vocals as clear as a bell.
   Con: It's very easy to find her very boring.

   Song: "Lilac Wine"
   Team: Pharrell

2. Mary Sarah

   Pro: Mary Sarah's the only female country artist left.
   Con: We already have Carrie Underwood, and she's not as pitchy. What happened to the retro chick we loved in the blinds?

   Song: "So Small"
   Team: Blake

3. Bryan Bautista

   Pro: He's very, very confident.
   Con: He also mumbles, and his performance is about as exciting as watching paint dry.

   Song: "Kiss From A Rose"
   Team: Christina

4. Daniel Passino

   Pro: Daniel's vocals are smooth, and his time off the show means people aren't tired of him just yet.
   Con: There's something in the way he smiles through his eyes that makes it seem like he's in a cult.

   Song: "Human Nature"
   Team: Pharrell

5. Owen Danoff

   Pro: Owen can literally tell stories and paint pictures with his vocal inflections.
   Con: His "thing" is being introverted, which isn't necessarily all that appealing.

   Song: "7 Years"
   Team: Adam

6. Nick Hagelin

   Pro: Nick FINALLY sings in his lower range, which is lovely and makes him seem 1000% more tolerable.
   Con: He's the sort of dude who writes his wife poems, which sounds sweet, but you just know they must be terrible.

   Song: "Mine Would Be You"
   Team: Christina

7. Paxton Ingram

   Pro: He's so cute that Blake has a major crush on him.
   Con: He wants to be an inspirational singer...but he chooses to sing a Selena Gomez song?

   Song: "Hands To Myself"
   Team: Blake

8. Hannah Huston

   Pro: Hannah really surprises this week with her harder edge and vocal growl.
   Con: n/a. She's coming into her own at exactly the right time.

   Song: "Sometimes"
   Team: Pharrell

9. Alisan Porter

   Pro: She's literally been groomed to be a pop star, complete with tragic addict background and well-known early childhood breakout role.
   Con: The fawning can make her unpalatable.

   Song: "Stone Cold"
   Team: Christina

10. Laith Al-Saadi

    Pro: He's a pro, he's literally shared the stage with B.B. King, and his vocal growl is dirty in the best way possible.
    Con: Will people really keep voting for a dude who looks like Freud?

    Song: "Born Under A Band Sign"
    Team: Adam

11. Adam Wakefield

    Pro: He's a white country dude who manages to wear both a trucker hat and a cowboy hat this week.
    Con: He's probably splitting the vote with Laith.

    Song: "Soulshine"
    Team: Blake

12. Shalyah Fearing

    Pro: She's adorable! She's pitch-perfect! And she's humble!
    Con: She's still young, and nerves might yet trip her up.

    Song: "Up To The Mountain"
    Team: Adam

What did you think of the night's performances? Anyone you're actively rooting for? Against? And how much longer do you think we're going to have to deal with Pharrell's hat?